What really happens when you know something is killing you from inside...but you can't say that to anyone...no one at all...
What happens when you particularly know that you are not being able to forget him (at least for the time being)...but pretend to yourself all the time that you have succeeded in doing that...
What happens when you know that he just thinks you as a mere 'acquaintance' ...yet you wait for a word from him...
Things happen in life, they do...without any intentions, without any reason...Things have happened with me too, all through my life...
I am 24 and still it is happening...in office, at the cafeteria...at the airport...
I still wonder when I started to like him. I still remember my first impression had been "Oh another of those regular guys in life...trying to be cooler than usual and friendlier than necessary!"
I still remember the first dinner at office together, the first walk together...and he came out of being a 'regular guy' to him...the first time I liked him...
I remember all the chats, all the times I started pinging him...and when I went back to check I saw it was me who had unheedingly been always the proactive starter of all the conversations...the first time he seemed a nice person, a nice friend (in spite of all that I heard about him...in spite of all that I definitely knew about him)...
I remember the first time I felt jealous because I saw another girl with him...remember the first time I stopped talking to him and started avoiding him (in fear of hurting myself again...I knew we were no match!)...the first time I missed him all the while...
I remember the first time he asked me if I was angry with him...the first time I wanted to hug him...the first time I loved him...
I remember the first dinner out, the first ride on his bike...I remember all the while him telling me about all the girls he liked...and knowing every moment that he would never feel that for me...the first time I wanted to go away from him...
What happens when you were just thinking about him, and you come back to your desk to see his ping...
What happens the first time he pings you on chat...the first time your fingers go cold and you blush...what happens when the first time he pings you, he pings to say that your friend was looking very pretty...
It's the first time you cry for someone who will never bother to think about you...
